Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Casualties of War

Phil Cooley, owner of Slow's Barbeque, has suffered some setbacks this year. Other people are cashing in on elements of his business plan, which mostly consists of taking something simple, and giving it that aura of "hip".

One group of provocateurs realized that when Cooley cashed in on barbequed food and beer, that he left out two elements that often go along with them. Crude picnic tables and the open air involve very little investment. You also take out the hassle of food safety compliance, and you now have a bonafide moneymaker by the name of Tashmoo Biergarten (albeit, a seasonal one).

Competitors have also moved in on his simple business plan of selling barbequed food in relative proximity to big league sporting venues (so that people from even the most outlying suburbs will still feel safe), while cutting corners on the hipster douchebag elements. Other businesses hawking the same wares forced him to address his restaurant's long wait times. While those wait times added to Slow's mystique, they also caused would-be customers to look elsewhere, which meant losing out on potential sales.

Cooley won't tolerate all these indignities any longer. His first move has been to launch an electronic assault on one of his repeated tormentors.
Meander on over to eatthiscity.com, and you'll see that Cooley has employed cyber-mercenaries to invade and take over the site. The place that once mocked his grandeur will now direct people to his own site.

Now where am I supposed to go to get my fix of the "[he who must not be name] invented ___" catchphrase?

You don't have to worry about this humble site falling victim to a similar attack. I've got top notch cyber defenses in place.

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